My Well

"It's like when you're dehydrated and you just want some really cold great water, but you drink soda instead--it's just not....right." That's something I said that kind of inspired this song I guess. And it's rather dualistic--'cause it's about my relationship with God...and this ever evasive other relationship.

I've been living with a well
I didn't know was dry
Damn the wretched rain
For showing me my need

I didn't know my thirst
Until that first taste
And now I ache for more
But the skies refuse to rain

My well is an ache in my heart for you
To be by my side
My well is an ache in my heart
The water I need is the love that you give

Quench my thirst with something that will satisfy
Something that won't leave me dry
Quench my thirst--make it last for more than just tonight
Make me feel alive

My well is an ache in my heart for you
To be by my side
My well is an ache in my heart
The water I need is the love that you give

Friends? ha.

Well. I guess it's always good to find out what people really think.


Like finding out that your friends who have been encouraging you to pursue writing and recording your own music don't actually think you can do it. This being made obvious by the fact that they tell you to find lots of opportunities to play and record--but when an opportunity comes up to play--they tell you they think you're not good enough. Sweet. Never mind that the other people who are playing--half of their songs don't even have memorable or follow-able melodies. Never mind that they have the same "areas of growth" to the same degree that I do--meaning they're not much better than me in the first place. They're just--well, them. and I'm me. Which means I don't get recognized, just patronized. And them? Well they get recognized--and treated like the gods of the CCU music scene. Great.

Well. I should be done with my rant. I guess I'm done writing music for now too.

Unnoticed

Unnoticed
By Until June

Raindrops falling on the rooftop,
leave me feeling lonely.
Left here sitting,
Left here on my own.
Poisen ashes fill my lungs deep with the sounds of silence.
Smoking lies of where to search for love.

And the years go on and on
And the days go by
Oh, and I was unnoticed.

Now I'm older
passed this over
Watched my life grow colder
Holding tighter, never letting go.

Well I need you inside cause I feel so untied and I don't know why,
no I don't
Well I need you inside cause I feel so untied and I don't know why,
no I don't know why
I was unnoticed



Exactly.

To Be Lonely

I’ve never felt this way before

But now I know

I know what it’s like to be lonely

Does anyone know what it’s like

To be lonely?

It’s when something’s wrong and no one cares

as much as you do

It’s when something’s right, and no one cares

as much as you do

Does anyone know what it’s like

To lie all alone

When all you want

Is someone to hold you

To have friends who try

But just aren’t enough

To pray every night and wake up

Feeling the same

I’ve never felt this way before

But now I know

I know what it’s like to be lonely.

Joy, peace and patience. That's all there is to it.

"When I think of the wisdom and scope of God's plan, I fall to my knees and pray to the Father, the Creator of everything in heaven and on earth. I pray that from His glorious, unlimited resources He will give you mighty inner strength through his Holy Spirit. And I pray that Christ will be more and more at home in your hearts as you trust Him. May your roots go down deep into the soil of God's marvelous love. And may you have the power to understand, as all God's people should, how wide, how long, how high, and how deep His love really is. May you experience the love of Christ, though it is so great you will never fully understand it. And so at last you will be filled up with God Himself. Now glory be to God who by His mighty power at work within us is able to do far more than we would ever dare to ask or even dream--infinitely beyond our highest prayers, desires, thoughts, or hopes. May He be given glory forever and ever through endless ages because of His master plan of salvation for the church through Jesus Christ." Ephesians 3:14-21

Letting Go of Everything Good

I want to follow You, but where You're leading me
I don't want to go
I want to follow You, but where You're leading me
I don't want to go

I know that in the end I'll be where I'm 'sposed to be
I'm just not so sure of this road You've put me on....but

I'm letting go of everything good
For the hope of something better
I don't know what lies ahead
I only know I am trusting You
So I'm letting go

This road is so full of questions that I
Am too afraid to ask
This road is so full of questions that I
Am too afraid to ask

But like a child, I'll ask them anyway
I may not understand your words, but Your voice is the love I needed to hear....so

I'm letting go of everything good
For the hope of something better
I don't know what lies ahead
I only know I am trusting You
So I'm letting go

Just a few thoughts.....

Just a few thoughts from things I have been reading lately:

Romans 13:10 "Love does no wrong to anyone, so love satisfies all of God's requirements." I just think sometimes we make "doing the right thing" way to hard. I remember a speaker at a conference once saying "quit praying for 32 days about what God wants you to do and as long as it is following what Jesus said was the greatest commandment, loving people, and as long as you don't have any blaring red flags going off in your head, JUST DO IT. Just love people already." (That was paraphrased but it was similar to that.) And I think this verse really supports that. I need to be better at that, because I make deciding what is the right thing way to complicated most of the time.

1 Corinthians 1:22 "God's way seems foolish to the Jews because they want a sign from Heaven to prove it is true. And it is foolish to the Greeks because they believe only what agrees with their own wisdom." How true is this....beyond the Jew/Greek divide. What are the things that trip people up about the way God is doing things? Usually because it isn't obvious enough or because they can't make it fit into their understanding of God. Well, change your understanding of God. God's plan is sometimes neither obvious nor within our comprehension.